Taru Fisher was 81 when she returned to The Boomer Woman’s Podcast for a conversation about something that irritated both of us: ageism.

Not simply the obvious kind, either.

We talk about elder speak — that maddening tendency to speak to an older adult as though intelligence disappeared along with youthful skin. We talk about healthcare professionals addressing the younger companion instead of the older patient. We talk about assumptions that Boomers can’t possibly understand technology. And we talk about the ageist messages younger generations absorb long before they themselves become old.

But perhaps the most uncomfortable ageism is the kind we turn on ourselves.

How often do we say I’m too old for that when age isn’t actually the issue? How often do we accept somebody else’s definition of what 60, 70 or 80 is supposed to look like?

Taru and I also wander into the value of older women’s experience, the relationships between generations, the wisdom of knowing when to conserve our energy — and why ageing doesn’t mean disappearing from the world.

As I said during our conversation: “Sixty is sixty. Seventy is seventy. This is what a seventy-year-old looks like these days.”

And Taru has an equally good reason for embracing her years: she’s proud of what she’s learned — including the lessons that weren’t easy to acquire.

Originally published November 30, 2023. Revisited because good conversations don’t have an expiry date.

Throughout my life, people have told me they appreciated my moxie.

I was never one to sit back and watch life go by.

I had plenty of times in my life when I had to stand up and tell others to stand back. (Being a nurse in a psychiatric hospital was a great training ground.)

But I was never angrier or more riled up than what happened when I hit 60.

Bad enough were the changes I noticed in myself. Let’s face it – watching your hair, your face, and your energy start fading is no one’s idea of a good time.

But that wasn’t the worst of it.

The worst was when I woke up one day and realized I had become invisible. People weren’t talking to me or even at me. They just weren’t seeing me at all.

That’s when I knew I had to stand up and speak out.

The first thing I did was kick those age-old old age stereotypes out of my head. I knew I still had plenty of living left to do – wisdom to share, contributions to make – and I intended to do it.

The next thing I did was reach out to find women who wanted to go with me.

For the last 18 years, I’ve been coaching women to explore and yes, even celebrate this time in their lives. Helping women share their wisdom, renew their purpose, and negotiate their challenges has made my life as rich and meaningful as it’s ever been.

I’m 81 now and find I’m more open, more ready, and more excited than ever. This is my purpose, and my mission, and I absolutely treasure being able to do this work.

If there’s more you’d like to do, something you’d like to explore, or you would just appreciate being part of a community of warm, caring women, you’ve come to the right place.

Since this episode originally aired, Taru can mostly be found on Substack: https://tarufisher.substack.com/

Taru and Agnes’ conversation about NLP